When I was a little girl, I would amuse myself by twirling a globe around. After several seconds, I would stop it and place my finger somewhere random and say, "one day I will go there," or, "this is the country I will get married in." I couldn't help but notice one particular city in the southern most part of Africa. It was a city that carried my name--or at least, I liked to think so. Johannesburg! Even at four years old, I had taken ownership of the city I would fly into on March 29, 2013. Little did I know just how connected this country would be to my true identity.
After being accepted to the South Africa trip--my second choice after Paris (but not for long--https://www.youcaring.com/sendjoannatoparis) --I spent months preparing for this trip. From narrowing down my choices, to writing, rewriting, and sending out my fundraising letter, to attending our team meetings, to calling my bank, I always had something to prepare. Spiritually, I had this intense time intercession the week before I left. I would take prayer walks and call forth God to people throughout the nations, and in particular during my trips to South Africa and France. Personally, I was also praying areas in my life that were dry and lacking.
While I had spent several months preparing, I honestly had no idea what to expect when I took my seat on the plane to Frankfurt. Within the first several days of my mission trip, I realized this: everything that I had been praying into was beginning to be fulfilled. I was living from perfect peace. I was making brothers. I was believing in my heart what I had only known in my head. I was releasing life to people through creativity. In sharing the key themes, testimonies, and moments that were imperative to this transformation process, I believe the same breakthroughs will be released to you. So what have you been praying for?
After being accepted to the South Africa trip--my second choice after Paris (but not for long--https://www.youcaring.com/sendjoannatoparis) --I spent months preparing for this trip. From narrowing down my choices, to writing, rewriting, and sending out my fundraising letter, to attending our team meetings, to calling my bank, I always had something to prepare. Spiritually, I had this intense time intercession the week before I left. I would take prayer walks and call forth God to people throughout the nations, and in particular during my trips to South Africa and France. Personally, I was also praying areas in my life that were dry and lacking.
While I had spent several months preparing, I honestly had no idea what to expect when I took my seat on the plane to Frankfurt. Within the first several days of my mission trip, I realized this: everything that I had been praying into was beginning to be fulfilled. I was living from perfect peace. I was making brothers. I was believing in my heart what I had only known in my head. I was releasing life to people through creativity. In sharing the key themes, testimonies, and moments that were imperative to this transformation process, I believe the same breakthroughs will be released to you. So what have you been praying for?
Overflow
This was my mantra before leaving. I was known to speak, but I wanted to be a better listener. Just days before the 27th, a stranger had prayed for me.
"This is your time to be an arrow, instead of going scattergun like a shotgun with your enthusiasm," she had told me. "I see this arrow reaching Rennes and all the points around it."
In Stilfontein, I felt like I was doing only what the Holy Spirit whispered for me to do. I was intentional about listening to people and only sharing my heart when asked. I was so at peace. It was exhilerating.
"If you haven't been living in the overflow yet, it's only April," Kobus Jr. Van Rensburg said, "You have eight months to catch up!"
During our braai with the Van Rensburgs, I decided to sit down next to a Second Year student named John while savoring the best sausage I had ever had. When he asked me about my testimony, I spoke. And spoke. I felt like a waterfall was pouring out from my mouth. It was so perfect. God had given me this opportunity to speak; I could feel Him all around me. Trust in God as He moves you...His timing is perfect!
"This is your time to be an arrow, instead of going scattergun like a shotgun with your enthusiasm," she had told me. "I see this arrow reaching Rennes and all the points around it."
In Stilfontein, I felt like I was doing only what the Holy Spirit whispered for me to do. I was intentional about listening to people and only sharing my heart when asked. I was so at peace. It was exhilerating.
"If you haven't been living in the overflow yet, it's only April," Kobus Jr. Van Rensburg said, "You have eight months to catch up!"
During our braai with the Van Rensburgs, I decided to sit down next to a Second Year student named John while savoring the best sausage I had ever had. When he asked me about my testimony, I spoke. And spoke. I felt like a waterfall was pouring out from my mouth. It was so perfect. God had given me this opportunity to speak; I could feel Him all around me. Trust in God as He moves you...His timing is perfect!
Testimonies: Releasing Freedom through Creativity
"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth."
This is one of the most explosive verses in the Bible. It reveals the spontaneous, creative, excited and life-giving nature of the Creator. The Lord dreamed up the world. There would be a splash of water there; a striped animal there; a pristine cove of water there; and...a son created in his very own image!!! God kept directing me to His very first story during our trip. At least three people used it in their sermons. As a student said at the beginning of our trip, "the original purpose of speech was not communication, it was creation." All year, strangers and students had told me how powerful my singing and dancing were. The staff had told me how powerful my words were and how much value I had.
I believed it. Sort of. It was there in my head, but not in my heart. It was not until South Africa that I actually took ownership of the authority, value, and beauty I carried. For the first time, I knew in my heart that what God had put in my heart truly would transform nations.
The first night of our trip, one specific thought would not stop plaguing my mind:
I must tell Daniel to stretch me on this trip.
I was terrified of doing so. But I did. I walked up to him and said, "Daniel. There is so much in my heart that NEEDS to be expressed. I give you permission to ask me to do anything on this trip, and I will do it with enthusiasm."
"Okay," he grinned. "Thanks for telling me."
That was it.
Three days later, I was on a stage in front of at least 200 youth and adults doing back-up for vocals. I had done this twice in my life...kind of. And that was for a small youth group of 20-60 students. I started out feeling nervous. As I let myself be drawn into God's presence, I closed my eyes, moved my body, and focused on my main purpose:worshiping God and ushering in His presence.
"Worship was amazing tonight," our team agreed during a debrief time later that night. "Joanna," Tom said, "I kept looking at you during worship. You were drawing people in." I was so proud of myself.
A few days later, a Second Year student named Brandon led our team in Knysna, where we would activate the youth in the prophetic. Brandon called each member of our small team up to prophesy over students. Instead of doing the "normal" thing and simply speaking a word over someone, he decided to be different.
"Christie," he said, his lips twisting into a smile. Christie looked at him with pleading eyes.
"You are going to prophetically rap over someone as Jathan provides the beat."
And so it was. And the youth saw that it was good.
"Wasn't that great?" he asked. "Now, Danae is a fabulous singer. Danae, will you please choose someone to sing over?"
And so it was. And the youth saw that this was also very good.
"Joanna."
As Brandon placed a friendly hand of support on my back, I had a feeling that I knew what he was going to ask. Just not rap. Please, not rap.
"Joanna dances."
And so it was.
"Rebecca, will you come up?" I asked.
The 14-year old blond smiled and slipped out of her seat as her peers cheered her on.
As Kim Walker-Smith invited us to 'Dance,' I followed her command, took Beks' scarf and hands, and twirled her around. She looked surprised. She looked free. We spun around. I let go and simply flowed with the music as people gathered toward the front. When the music stopped, I explained what God was saying through the dance between gasps of breath.
"I want to dance as freely as you!" she said. Tears were rolling down her cheeks. "Something was released in me as you did that!"
That night, I caught her worshiping with her friends towards the front after the church service.
All year, strangers had come up to me and told me things like:
"I was slain in the spirit as you were dancing."
"Your dancing is so powerful. People feel a lot of freedom when you worship."
I had never actually seen its effect happen right in front of me though. It was incredible.
Another incident where I saw the effect of creativity was in Johannesburg. A group of us were ministering at a youth service. When Tom asked me to prophetically sing over someone, I chose a girl at random who raised her hand. I really didn't like my song. There was no melodic or lyrical congruency in it and I did not feel God's presence or power in it. While I was singing, however, the girl started sobbing! After the service, however, she came up to me.
"My father abandoned me when I was two years old. When you sang, 'your daddy thinks you are the sweetest thing,' I started crying. Also, I love singing, so it was perfect that you sang that over me!"
Throughout July through September 2012, people had told me that I would write and sing very powerful prophetic songs that would affect the entire world. At the time, I assumed this would look like releasing a CD and touring the world. Now, I released that this word was already being fulfilled!
Then there was Richard. We split up into teams of five our fourth night in Stilfontein and walkd the streets to minister to prostitutes and pimps. After a half hour, we realized that sadly, most of the girls refused to talk to us. So we did the next best thing, and ministered to a man working a car repair shop at one of the street corners. While this was happening, a middle-aged man walked up to our team and asked if we could light his cigarette.
"Nope," Spencer said. "But I have something better. It'll get you totally wacked!"
"Really?" Richard asked. "What is it?"
"I've got Jesus!"
"Wait--are you Christians?"
"Yes."
"Please don't hit me! Don't hit me!" he kept saying.
"We don't want to hit you. We want to love you. Jesus loves you so much, man."
It took a few moments, but finally Richard dropped his cigarette to the ground, opened his hands, and opened himself up to receive our prayers.
"Richard, I see that when you were younger, you wanted to be a writer," said Downing. "You had journals filled with story ideas. God wants those dreams to come alive again. Do you know Jesus?"
"I used to, but then I backslid," Richard said. He then started to cry.
"Do you want to feel His love?" Spencer asked.
Richard nodded.
"Okay. I am going to place my hands on you and when I do, you are going to feel His presence."
As Spencer laid hands on Richard, he started to cry.
"Do you feel it? That's Jesus. Do you want to invite Him back into your heart?"
"Yes, yes, I do!"
So on Monday, April 1, at approximately 9:30 pm, we prayed with him and a lost son found his way back into his father's arms.
A bus honked in the distance.
"That's our ride!" Spencer said. "We better go, you guys, or else we will be late!"
"Richard, walk with us!" I said. "I have a song for you!"
I slipped my hand in his and gently sang, "Won't you walk into this heart, and bring your love? Beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, praise for heaviness, he's for Your glory!"
He continued to cry and asked if he could hug me.
"Thank you guys. You've made me cry for the first time in 16 years."
This all took place in less than 10 minutes. During a bus ride to Pretoria, I saw a billboard that said, "Everything could change in a moment." How true this is. When people feel real love, they can't help but want more. As 2 Corinthians 6:2 says, "...now is the time of God's favor, now is the day of salvation." I bless you to be able to minister with love and power and see people's heart easily be drawn to Jesus!
After I had said goodbye to Richard that night and sat back down on the bus, Georgia run up to the front.
"You guys!" she burst out. "We prayed for a prostitute tonight. She had actually already become a Christian, but was still addicted to drugs. When we prayed for her, she was delivered from this addiction. Right afterwards, all the drugs and alcohol left her system and she forgave the man who brought her into prostitution in the first place. She is now making plans to leave prostitution. I prophesied that she would find a house by Wednesday!"
I must admit that I was shocked when, two days later, we were told that, through the help of Spirit Word, she had now found somewhere to live.
One of my favorite moments happened on the last day of our trip. One of our team members was feeling sick. I wanted to go and comfort him by singing over him, lending him my pillow to lean back on, and massinging his shoulders. My natural instinct was this: INNAPROPRIATE. After all, who did that? One thing that God had shown me, however, is that my ideas and actions are original and life-changing.
"Don't expect the leaders to recognize everything you do," he had said. "I have opened your eyes to specific things for a reason."
So I sang, and sang, and sang.
"I feel so much peace..." he murmured.
No one else may have known it, but this was such a huge step for me.
One of the first days back at school, during worship, they started playing "Alive." I couldn't help but laugh and dance and pray as I screamed,
"I'm coming alive!"
This was my time.
Later that week, I was at the last French-speaking group of the year. When the leader suggest we pray for one another, I approached an older French couple. They looked a bit lost, so I started singing over them. When I did, I felt power and authority surging through every word. They were so touched that they emailed me later and asked if I would send them the word. Apparently, they pastored a church.
"Let us know when you are coming to France," they added.
This step had been huge for me. In France, I was so often intimidated by the French people's lack of openness that I would refuse to minister to them. For the first time, I was taken a step of action. I knew how powerful I was this time.
The following Monday, I sat down next to Anne, a friend from Norway.
"You actually recognize your beauty," she said. "It is so much easier for you to let me love you..."
Christy took me shopping later and I bought a whole new wardrobe as if a way to describe the change that had taken place in me. And as if to affirm this, someone would tell me I was gorgeous. every. single. day.
This is one of the most explosive verses in the Bible. It reveals the spontaneous, creative, excited and life-giving nature of the Creator. The Lord dreamed up the world. There would be a splash of water there; a striped animal there; a pristine cove of water there; and...a son created in his very own image!!! God kept directing me to His very first story during our trip. At least three people used it in their sermons. As a student said at the beginning of our trip, "the original purpose of speech was not communication, it was creation." All year, strangers and students had told me how powerful my singing and dancing were. The staff had told me how powerful my words were and how much value I had.
I believed it. Sort of. It was there in my head, but not in my heart. It was not until South Africa that I actually took ownership of the authority, value, and beauty I carried. For the first time, I knew in my heart that what God had put in my heart truly would transform nations.
The first night of our trip, one specific thought would not stop plaguing my mind:
I must tell Daniel to stretch me on this trip.
I was terrified of doing so. But I did. I walked up to him and said, "Daniel. There is so much in my heart that NEEDS to be expressed. I give you permission to ask me to do anything on this trip, and I will do it with enthusiasm."
"Okay," he grinned. "Thanks for telling me."
That was it.
Three days later, I was on a stage in front of at least 200 youth and adults doing back-up for vocals. I had done this twice in my life...kind of. And that was for a small youth group of 20-60 students. I started out feeling nervous. As I let myself be drawn into God's presence, I closed my eyes, moved my body, and focused on my main purpose:worshiping God and ushering in His presence.
"Worship was amazing tonight," our team agreed during a debrief time later that night. "Joanna," Tom said, "I kept looking at you during worship. You were drawing people in." I was so proud of myself.
A few days later, a Second Year student named Brandon led our team in Knysna, where we would activate the youth in the prophetic. Brandon called each member of our small team up to prophesy over students. Instead of doing the "normal" thing and simply speaking a word over someone, he decided to be different.
"Christie," he said, his lips twisting into a smile. Christie looked at him with pleading eyes.
"You are going to prophetically rap over someone as Jathan provides the beat."
And so it was. And the youth saw that it was good.
"Wasn't that great?" he asked. "Now, Danae is a fabulous singer. Danae, will you please choose someone to sing over?"
And so it was. And the youth saw that this was also very good.
"Joanna."
As Brandon placed a friendly hand of support on my back, I had a feeling that I knew what he was going to ask. Just not rap. Please, not rap.
"Joanna dances."
And so it was.
"Rebecca, will you come up?" I asked.
The 14-year old blond smiled and slipped out of her seat as her peers cheered her on.
As Kim Walker-Smith invited us to 'Dance,' I followed her command, took Beks' scarf and hands, and twirled her around. She looked surprised. She looked free. We spun around. I let go and simply flowed with the music as people gathered toward the front. When the music stopped, I explained what God was saying through the dance between gasps of breath.
"I want to dance as freely as you!" she said. Tears were rolling down her cheeks. "Something was released in me as you did that!"
That night, I caught her worshiping with her friends towards the front after the church service.
All year, strangers had come up to me and told me things like:
"I was slain in the spirit as you were dancing."
"Your dancing is so powerful. People feel a lot of freedom when you worship."
I had never actually seen its effect happen right in front of me though. It was incredible.
Another incident where I saw the effect of creativity was in Johannesburg. A group of us were ministering at a youth service. When Tom asked me to prophetically sing over someone, I chose a girl at random who raised her hand. I really didn't like my song. There was no melodic or lyrical congruency in it and I did not feel God's presence or power in it. While I was singing, however, the girl started sobbing! After the service, however, she came up to me.
"My father abandoned me when I was two years old. When you sang, 'your daddy thinks you are the sweetest thing,' I started crying. Also, I love singing, so it was perfect that you sang that over me!"
Throughout July through September 2012, people had told me that I would write and sing very powerful prophetic songs that would affect the entire world. At the time, I assumed this would look like releasing a CD and touring the world. Now, I released that this word was already being fulfilled!
Then there was Richard. We split up into teams of five our fourth night in Stilfontein and walkd the streets to minister to prostitutes and pimps. After a half hour, we realized that sadly, most of the girls refused to talk to us. So we did the next best thing, and ministered to a man working a car repair shop at one of the street corners. While this was happening, a middle-aged man walked up to our team and asked if we could light his cigarette.
"Nope," Spencer said. "But I have something better. It'll get you totally wacked!"
"Really?" Richard asked. "What is it?"
"I've got Jesus!"
"Wait--are you Christians?"
"Yes."
"Please don't hit me! Don't hit me!" he kept saying.
"We don't want to hit you. We want to love you. Jesus loves you so much, man."
It took a few moments, but finally Richard dropped his cigarette to the ground, opened his hands, and opened himself up to receive our prayers.
"Richard, I see that when you were younger, you wanted to be a writer," said Downing. "You had journals filled with story ideas. God wants those dreams to come alive again. Do you know Jesus?"
"I used to, but then I backslid," Richard said. He then started to cry.
"Do you want to feel His love?" Spencer asked.
Richard nodded.
"Okay. I am going to place my hands on you and when I do, you are going to feel His presence."
As Spencer laid hands on Richard, he started to cry.
"Do you feel it? That's Jesus. Do you want to invite Him back into your heart?"
"Yes, yes, I do!"
So on Monday, April 1, at approximately 9:30 pm, we prayed with him and a lost son found his way back into his father's arms.
A bus honked in the distance.
"That's our ride!" Spencer said. "We better go, you guys, or else we will be late!"
"Richard, walk with us!" I said. "I have a song for you!"
I slipped my hand in his and gently sang, "Won't you walk into this heart, and bring your love? Beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, praise for heaviness, he's for Your glory!"
He continued to cry and asked if he could hug me.
"Thank you guys. You've made me cry for the first time in 16 years."
This all took place in less than 10 minutes. During a bus ride to Pretoria, I saw a billboard that said, "Everything could change in a moment." How true this is. When people feel real love, they can't help but want more. As 2 Corinthians 6:2 says, "...now is the time of God's favor, now is the day of salvation." I bless you to be able to minister with love and power and see people's heart easily be drawn to Jesus!
After I had said goodbye to Richard that night and sat back down on the bus, Georgia run up to the front.
"You guys!" she burst out. "We prayed for a prostitute tonight. She had actually already become a Christian, but was still addicted to drugs. When we prayed for her, she was delivered from this addiction. Right afterwards, all the drugs and alcohol left her system and she forgave the man who brought her into prostitution in the first place. She is now making plans to leave prostitution. I prophesied that she would find a house by Wednesday!"
I must admit that I was shocked when, two days later, we were told that, through the help of Spirit Word, she had now found somewhere to live.
One of my favorite moments happened on the last day of our trip. One of our team members was feeling sick. I wanted to go and comfort him by singing over him, lending him my pillow to lean back on, and massinging his shoulders. My natural instinct was this: INNAPROPRIATE. After all, who did that? One thing that God had shown me, however, is that my ideas and actions are original and life-changing.
"Don't expect the leaders to recognize everything you do," he had said. "I have opened your eyes to specific things for a reason."
So I sang, and sang, and sang.
"I feel so much peace..." he murmured.
No one else may have known it, but this was such a huge step for me.
One of the first days back at school, during worship, they started playing "Alive." I couldn't help but laugh and dance and pray as I screamed,
"I'm coming alive!"
This was my time.
Later that week, I was at the last French-speaking group of the year. When the leader suggest we pray for one another, I approached an older French couple. They looked a bit lost, so I started singing over them. When I did, I felt power and authority surging through every word. They were so touched that they emailed me later and asked if I would send them the word. Apparently, they pastored a church.
"Let us know when you are coming to France," they added.
This step had been huge for me. In France, I was so often intimidated by the French people's lack of openness that I would refuse to minister to them. For the first time, I was taken a step of action. I knew how powerful I was this time.
The following Monday, I sat down next to Anne, a friend from Norway.
"You actually recognize your beauty," she said. "It is so much easier for you to let me love you..."
Christy took me shopping later and I bought a whole new wardrobe as if a way to describe the change that had taken place in me. And as if to affirm this, someone would tell me I was gorgeous. every. single. day.
Brothers/Limitless Changes Everything
During the first five days in South Africa, our entire team member fit onto a giant bus driven by a guy from Spirit Word. I would make it a point to sit next to someone different every time and strike up a conversation. After a few days, I realized that I was meeting all the guys. I felt the Lord say, "Joanna. I am highlighting them to you because you need to learn to have brothers."
This had started before our team had left. At our third team meeting, I had tapped a guy named Dima on the shoulder.
"Hi, this might sound strange since I've never really talked to you before, but I feel like God is saying that you're a great big brother."
He grinned. "Thanks, Joanna. A lot of girls tell me that."
At the next team meeting, it just seemed so right when he gave me a big hug and said, "Hi, Sis!" We had only ever had one conversation, it felt like he had been my brother for a lifetime. The affection was perfect.
Each brother had a different "feel." Matt was nother one. I would often sit by him and ask him to tell me stories from his years of world travel, and he would ask me to sing. It was a great switch-off.
"Joanna, do you have any brothers?"
"Nope."
"Well, you're a great little sister."
"And you're a great big brother!" I smiled.
I had many talks with Schuyler, as well. I did not know that there was such a thing as a spirit of adventure until we started talking. I would share testimonies from my year in France, and he would share stories about his bike trip around Europe.
"Anyone is ready to send a missionary to Africa," he said, "But what if we sent missionaries out into the rock-climbing world and the climbers experienced healings and supernatural encounters?"
"Then I would be behind you with a videocamera to document it all!" I said.
It was amazing how much we pulled out of each other. God has really used our friendship to make the spirit of adventure in me come alive and believe that NOTHING is impossible! Within five days, I had outlined a multi-faceted woman's healing ministry event to launch, a vision for how empowerment and evangelism should work in the church, and a strategy for how to travel the world and document testimonies, then publish an online magazine that would ignite passion in believers all over the world. I had never gotten so many ministry ideas within such a short amount of time! God was really up to something there.
Then there was Brenton. We just had FUN together. One time, we prophesied over one another's summers.
"I see you walking into a cathedral..." he said. "This summer will be stretching."
I felt like I bonded with my team in three weeks more quickly and intimately than I had bonded with anyone in seven months. Every night for the first half of our trip, Daniel would have us debrief. Sometimes, we would worship. We would laugh, cry, be up until 2 am. I would look for them every day once I got back and eagerly give hugs. Every time we would see each other at school or parties, we would have a mini reunion and take photos. I can't wait for these friendships to develop into the next
year...I had really been praying that I would develop intimate and healthy relationships before I left. My brothers and sisters showed me what deep, true, beautiful love and affection looked like.Since South Africa, I have only gotten closer to my team members. To those reading this, thank you--being around and learning from you has been one of the greatest experiences of this trip and of this year.
This had started before our team had left. At our third team meeting, I had tapped a guy named Dima on the shoulder.
"Hi, this might sound strange since I've never really talked to you before, but I feel like God is saying that you're a great big brother."
He grinned. "Thanks, Joanna. A lot of girls tell me that."
At the next team meeting, it just seemed so right when he gave me a big hug and said, "Hi, Sis!" We had only ever had one conversation, it felt like he had been my brother for a lifetime. The affection was perfect.
Each brother had a different "feel." Matt was nother one. I would often sit by him and ask him to tell me stories from his years of world travel, and he would ask me to sing. It was a great switch-off.
"Joanna, do you have any brothers?"
"Nope."
"Well, you're a great little sister."
"And you're a great big brother!" I smiled.
I had many talks with Schuyler, as well. I did not know that there was such a thing as a spirit of adventure until we started talking. I would share testimonies from my year in France, and he would share stories about his bike trip around Europe.
"Anyone is ready to send a missionary to Africa," he said, "But what if we sent missionaries out into the rock-climbing world and the climbers experienced healings and supernatural encounters?"
"Then I would be behind you with a videocamera to document it all!" I said.
It was amazing how much we pulled out of each other. God has really used our friendship to make the spirit of adventure in me come alive and believe that NOTHING is impossible! Within five days, I had outlined a multi-faceted woman's healing ministry event to launch, a vision for how empowerment and evangelism should work in the church, and a strategy for how to travel the world and document testimonies, then publish an online magazine that would ignite passion in believers all over the world. I had never gotten so many ministry ideas within such a short amount of time! God was really up to something there.
Then there was Brenton. We just had FUN together. One time, we prophesied over one another's summers.
"I see you walking into a cathedral..." he said. "This summer will be stretching."
I felt like I bonded with my team in three weeks more quickly and intimately than I had bonded with anyone in seven months. Every night for the first half of our trip, Daniel would have us debrief. Sometimes, we would worship. We would laugh, cry, be up until 2 am. I would look for them every day once I got back and eagerly give hugs. Every time we would see each other at school or parties, we would have a mini reunion and take photos. I can't wait for these friendships to develop into the next
year...I had really been praying that I would develop intimate and healthy relationships before I left. My brothers and sisters showed me what deep, true, beautiful love and affection looked like.Since South Africa, I have only gotten closer to my team members. To those reading this, thank you--being around and learning from you has been one of the greatest experiences of this trip and of this year.
Grace, Righteousness, and the Fullness of the Gospel
"Lord, would you convict them of their righteousness!" Matt paced the stage, raised his voice, and lifted an arm as the audience erupted in applause.
I tried to keep up with Matt as I jotted down the Scriptures he had just used.
Convict me of my righteousness? Was it possible?
At Spirit Word, Prophet Kobus had begun to unveil the truth of what it meant for Jesus to have broken every curse so that we could truly LIVE for Him! As one person said, we are now clothed with Christ. Kris and Bill had already made excellent cases from Romans 6 about dying to our old selves. We had learned that "by His stripes, we have been healed" (1 Peter 2: 24) I got back from South Africa, I learned that I wasn't the only one who had been thinking about this. Cait was also "getting whacked" on unity with God and grace. One night, we had an hourlong discussion about it. I felt the Holy Spirit's anointing the whole time. There was whack on that! So I started camping out in the pauline epistles and reading them through an entirely new lens! Several days ago, I wrote the following out on an index card and taped it on the wall by my bed:
100% defined through Jesus.
As you read this, know that you are a new creation in Christ. The old has gone; the new has come! I pray that He equip you to not only know this, but to live this out, as I have started to do.
I tried to keep up with Matt as I jotted down the Scriptures he had just used.
Convict me of my righteousness? Was it possible?
At Spirit Word, Prophet Kobus had begun to unveil the truth of what it meant for Jesus to have broken every curse so that we could truly LIVE for Him! As one person said, we are now clothed with Christ. Kris and Bill had already made excellent cases from Romans 6 about dying to our old selves. We had learned that "by His stripes, we have been healed" (1 Peter 2: 24) I got back from South Africa, I learned that I wasn't the only one who had been thinking about this. Cait was also "getting whacked" on unity with God and grace. One night, we had an hourlong discussion about it. I felt the Holy Spirit's anointing the whole time. There was whack on that! So I started camping out in the pauline epistles and reading them through an entirely new lens! Several days ago, I wrote the following out on an index card and taped it on the wall by my bed:
100% defined through Jesus.
As you read this, know that you are a new creation in Christ. The old has gone; the new has come! I pray that He equip you to not only know this, but to live this out, as I have started to do.
Taking Ownership of How I Work
During my week in George, I was majorly stressed out, and I couldn't figure out why. Finally, I realized: I had not been intenional about having "me" time. On the way to Johannesburg, I made a list of how I work: I experience, absorb, process, rest, have fun, and then share! It was liberating; now I make these things my priority.
Being Chosen and Empowered
"Everything I do on this trip is for you guys. I will stretch you. It was in the mission trip description--that is why you signed up for this trip."
This was the one thing that Daniel said the most as we were preparing for our trip.
"I want you guys to know that I chose very one of you for this trip. I was the first leader of the five teams that would go to South Africa to choose my team. When I stretch you, it is because I am setting you up to grow, not to fail."
Daniel did stretch me on this trip...and yet, knowing that I was chosen changed everything. I felt so special to have been chosen by such an empowering leader.
One thing that has been on my heart since the beginning of the year was testimony. So, I was not surprised when Daniel asked me to take the daily testimony account (which, by the way, was 621 healings and 71 salvations.) Within a week of returning to Redding, he asked me to do make several slideshow-videos from our time. At the end of this 30-hour process, I asked him why he chose me.
"My mom said you were the most organized person she had ever met on a mission trip," he replied. "And I knew you would do it with excellence--whereas others would do only a half-hearted job.
Daniel also required us to preach. I came alive when speaking about our calling to a life of adventure and abundance! He also empowered the Second Years to lead at churches that Daniel had never been to himself--and they absolutely rocked it.
I am so honored to have been chosen by such an empowering leader. Now, I feel like God is saying, "This is symbolic for you. I chose you from the foundations of the earth, for this very time in history, for this very moment. I am going to empower you in this next season to do the impossible."
He put such high value on team time as well. We would debrief for up three hours, each one of us sharing testimonies and stories about what had impacted each of us most. One night, he had each First Year student prophetically speak, sing, or rap over a Second Year student. They were such amazing leaders, and I was eager to learn from them.
He also was the king of surprises! It's funny: Other than grace, I believe his corest of core values is excellence. Yet, he mixes it so well with spontaneity! There were so many times during the last half of the trip where I didn't know where I was going until we would pull into the driveway. A few seconds later, I would be playing with baby lion cubs, soaking to ethnic music while feeling aloe oil slathered down my back, trying alligator for the first time, running outside to an aeriel view of the Indian Ocean, or roasting marshmallows under the stars.
As someone who was used to planning everything...I loved it!!! This was an important step in learning adaptibility.
"Big Daddy" definitely taught me to expect good things, God says that that is just a foreshadow of what is to come. He loves to surprise his daughters!! A friend gave me the following word in February:
This was the one thing that Daniel said the most as we were preparing for our trip.
"I want you guys to know that I chose very one of you for this trip. I was the first leader of the five teams that would go to South Africa to choose my team. When I stretch you, it is because I am setting you up to grow, not to fail."
Daniel did stretch me on this trip...and yet, knowing that I was chosen changed everything. I felt so special to have been chosen by such an empowering leader.
One thing that has been on my heart since the beginning of the year was testimony. So, I was not surprised when Daniel asked me to take the daily testimony account (which, by the way, was 621 healings and 71 salvations.) Within a week of returning to Redding, he asked me to do make several slideshow-videos from our time. At the end of this 30-hour process, I asked him why he chose me.
"My mom said you were the most organized person she had ever met on a mission trip," he replied. "And I knew you would do it with excellence--whereas others would do only a half-hearted job.
Daniel also required us to preach. I came alive when speaking about our calling to a life of adventure and abundance! He also empowered the Second Years to lead at churches that Daniel had never been to himself--and they absolutely rocked it.
I am so honored to have been chosen by such an empowering leader. Now, I feel like God is saying, "This is symbolic for you. I chose you from the foundations of the earth, for this very time in history, for this very moment. I am going to empower you in this next season to do the impossible."
He put such high value on team time as well. We would debrief for up three hours, each one of us sharing testimonies and stories about what had impacted each of us most. One night, he had each First Year student prophetically speak, sing, or rap over a Second Year student. They were such amazing leaders, and I was eager to learn from them.
He also was the king of surprises! It's funny: Other than grace, I believe his corest of core values is excellence. Yet, he mixes it so well with spontaneity! There were so many times during the last half of the trip where I didn't know where I was going until we would pull into the driveway. A few seconds later, I would be playing with baby lion cubs, soaking to ethnic music while feeling aloe oil slathered down my back, trying alligator for the first time, running outside to an aeriel view of the Indian Ocean, or roasting marshmallows under the stars.
As someone who was used to planning everything...I loved it!!! This was an important step in learning adaptibility.
"Big Daddy" definitely taught me to expect good things, God says that that is just a foreshadow of what is to come. He loves to surprise his daughters!! A friend gave me the following word in February:
"I see many doors opening easily in this next season, this next part of your journey. Be open to unexpected and spontaneous adventures and surprises. You will learn quickly to adapt to a momen't snotice and even be able to thrive in such situations."
Sending me Out Again...
One of my prayers was that God would confirm my choice to spend time in France this summer.
I think the above speaks for itself...
I think the above speaks for itself...
Limitless Love
The Saturday before leaving, one of the most significant moments occured, though no one else knew. I felt God impress upon my heart that so much had been stolen from me (John 10:10) but that instead of shame He was giving me a double portion (Isaiah 61:7.) The night I got back from Redding, I sat at Christy and Benjy's feet as they told me how they had gotten together while I was in South Africa. I was distracted though. I could feel the tears gathering in the back of my eyes, but I refused to let them out. All my life, I had been terrified of exposing what I thought was a dark heart full of imperfection and shame. People had told me that my heart was actually beautiful and that there would be a moment during my trip where a plain-looking rock would crack open to reveal a beautiful treasure, but I'd never quite believed it. This was it. Finally, the tears decided to release themselves. buried my head in Christy's lap and began to cry tears that I had refused to let out all year.
"God changed my heart in South Africa!" I sobbed. "I actually know now that I have value and beauty. I would sing over people, and they would begin to weep. I would dance, and something would be released in them. I would give advice, and people would tell me their lives had been changed. I would tell someone that they would feel the healing fire of God when I touched them, and they did! Christy, I know in my heart and not just in my head that my words carry authority and that nations wil be transformed by what I carry!"
As Christy stroked me hair and looked into my eyes, she said: "God has waited so long for this, Joanna," she said. "He says, 'she's coming alive! She's coming alive!" Then, in her beautiful soprano, she
sang, "It's bubbling over, it's bubbling over!"
This is the first night I let God cut my heart open, tear out roots of fear and shame, and fill it back up with his liquid love. It's like the past six weeks have been one continuous open heart surgery. But it's like I have been on anesthesia, and the only side effect I can feel is a greater openness to Love.
A few days later, I was back at school. I twirled around, jumped, and shouted, as the worship team lead us in the song, "Alive" and I repeated that I was coming alive!! This had been the song that our driver had continually played on one ofour bus rides. It is the song that Daniel had asked me to use in the ministry
video. I think there is a pretty good chance God wanted me to hear it.
As I sat back down next to my friend Anne, she kissed my cheek and smiled. "You carry yourself like you know you are beautiful. And you let me love you so much more easily, which you didn't do before."
One night, Ginny and I got into a conversation about the
surgery God was doing on my heart. She asked me about the possibility of past
abuse in my life.
"I couldn't have asked you this two weeks ago," she said. "You would have taken it as rejection."
What's amazing is that the fear of failure and rejection are disolving. I hadn't even noticed till yesterday! There has been this exlosion of faith and love in my life! Even in the simple things, such as how I can now receive love from people I had always closed my heart to and let Emma cling to me and kiss Christy's cheek.
While on a bus to Johannesburg one day, I saw the following MetroPCS ad on a huge billboard:
Limitless Changes Everything.
I took ownership of it immediately. It has changed my life. Never before have I truly believed that nothing is impossible (see Luke 1:37.) Now I know that God provides for me because he is my proud Papa (as our Bible teacher Dann would say) who loves to abundantly bless me with gifts (see Matthew 7:11 and Luke 11:13.) While I still am practical, I plan with the expectation of God to show up instead of planning by lack. The Word of God over my life has become the very air I breathe. One day, I was singing my own song during worship, not focusing on the words, just on God's presence. When I realized what I was
singing, it nearly took my breath away.
"I've waited all my lifetime to see you shine," God whispered. "Prepare to be noticed..." he had
told me in Johannesburg.
For the first time, there are no hindrances to me believing the following:
"Yielded, obedient, passionate lover of mine. We will live in a contiuous state of adventure because of your soft heart towards me," (October 2012)
Whatever the next season is, I know he is preparing me very strategically! Will you be part of blesssing this?
"God changed my heart in South Africa!" I sobbed. "I actually know now that I have value and beauty. I would sing over people, and they would begin to weep. I would dance, and something would be released in them. I would give advice, and people would tell me their lives had been changed. I would tell someone that they would feel the healing fire of God when I touched them, and they did! Christy, I know in my heart and not just in my head that my words carry authority and that nations wil be transformed by what I carry!"
As Christy stroked me hair and looked into my eyes, she said: "God has waited so long for this, Joanna," she said. "He says, 'she's coming alive! She's coming alive!" Then, in her beautiful soprano, she
sang, "It's bubbling over, it's bubbling over!"
This is the first night I let God cut my heart open, tear out roots of fear and shame, and fill it back up with his liquid love. It's like the past six weeks have been one continuous open heart surgery. But it's like I have been on anesthesia, and the only side effect I can feel is a greater openness to Love.
A few days later, I was back at school. I twirled around, jumped, and shouted, as the worship team lead us in the song, "Alive" and I repeated that I was coming alive!! This had been the song that our driver had continually played on one ofour bus rides. It is the song that Daniel had asked me to use in the ministry
video. I think there is a pretty good chance God wanted me to hear it.
As I sat back down next to my friend Anne, she kissed my cheek and smiled. "You carry yourself like you know you are beautiful. And you let me love you so much more easily, which you didn't do before."
One night, Ginny and I got into a conversation about the
surgery God was doing on my heart. She asked me about the possibility of past
abuse in my life.
"I couldn't have asked you this two weeks ago," she said. "You would have taken it as rejection."
What's amazing is that the fear of failure and rejection are disolving. I hadn't even noticed till yesterday! There has been this exlosion of faith and love in my life! Even in the simple things, such as how I can now receive love from people I had always closed my heart to and let Emma cling to me and kiss Christy's cheek.
While on a bus to Johannesburg one day, I saw the following MetroPCS ad on a huge billboard:
Limitless Changes Everything.
I took ownership of it immediately. It has changed my life. Never before have I truly believed that nothing is impossible (see Luke 1:37.) Now I know that God provides for me because he is my proud Papa (as our Bible teacher Dann would say) who loves to abundantly bless me with gifts (see Matthew 7:11 and Luke 11:13.) While I still am practical, I plan with the expectation of God to show up instead of planning by lack. The Word of God over my life has become the very air I breathe. One day, I was singing my own song during worship, not focusing on the words, just on God's presence. When I realized what I was
singing, it nearly took my breath away.
"I've waited all my lifetime to see you shine," God whispered. "Prepare to be noticed..." he had
told me in Johannesburg.
For the first time, there are no hindrances to me believing the following:
"Yielded, obedient, passionate lover of mine. We will live in a contiuous state of adventure because of your soft heart towards me," (October 2012)
Whatever the next season is, I know he is preparing me very strategically! Will you be part of blesssing this?
Conclusion...or the Beginning of a New Chapter?
For some, a mission trip is a once-in-a-lifetime peak event.
For me, it was an important stepping stone to get to the next part of my journey.
I wrote this on March 2 on the blog "Our Father:"
"My mission trip is going to be a huge part of inviting in this new season. Showing me off
at my own debutante ball. I feel like this next season will be one of abundant favor: in relationships, finances, and opportunities. My mission trip is going to turn a key in my heart and ignite something powerful. I have done so much preparation."
Will you sow into this trip? Please consider sending me to Paris! I am SO excited about the possibilities. As God said, "Limitless Changes Everything..."
Blessings, and may your feet take you to greater heights than you ever thought possible. And I pray Ephesians 3:17b-19 over you: that you, being rooted and grounded in love, would have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Joanna
https://www.youcaring.com/sendjoannatoparis
For me, it was an important stepping stone to get to the next part of my journey.
I wrote this on March 2 on the blog "Our Father:"
"My mission trip is going to be a huge part of inviting in this new season. Showing me off
at my own debutante ball. I feel like this next season will be one of abundant favor: in relationships, finances, and opportunities. My mission trip is going to turn a key in my heart and ignite something powerful. I have done so much preparation."
Will you sow into this trip? Please consider sending me to Paris! I am SO excited about the possibilities. As God said, "Limitless Changes Everything..."
Blessings, and may your feet take you to greater heights than you ever thought possible. And I pray Ephesians 3:17b-19 over you: that you, being rooted and grounded in love, would have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Joanna
https://www.youcaring.com/sendjoannatoparis